I do not want to become my Mother.

«My project “I do not want to become my mother” is a deeply personal exploration of my complexrelationship with my mom, shaped by the societal expectations and limitations placed on women inmy culture which was largely based on toxic patriarchy. Growing up in apartheid-era South Africa,she was expected to prioritise her role as a mother and caregiver, suppressing her own artisticaspirations and political views. Being a child, I was oblivious of the turmoil our country was goingthrough at the time. As I grew older, I began to see the toll this took on her, and from a young age Iwitnessed it all culminating in a debilitating depression that made me fear I’d follow a similar path.I realised that what happens between mothers and daughters is often a reflection of the broadersocietal context – the way women are valued, the roles they’re expected to fulfil, and the dreamsthey’re discouraged from pursuing. My mother was expected to carry this generational trauma, andoften she was made to feel silenced, she simply had to acquiesce to what was expected of her, andso this was my role model as well. We spend our childhood watching our moms, soaking in howshe thinks, how she feels, how she behaves and does things, and particularly how she feels aboutherself. Through this project, I’m trying to understand my mom’s experiences, and my own, byreimagining memories and exploring our relationship through archival family photos andperformative self-portraiture. The archival images depict a sense of normalcy, when things were farfrom normal. By working with my mom and involving her in the process, I’m slowly uncoveringthe complexities of our bond and the ways in which our experiences are intertwined.«